on_silver_stars

Due to last night, I have had to re-write my dating history records and limits.

As I have been saying all day, God bless Australia.

In other news, I am hungry.

In other other news, this is a list of people I would consider marrying with little or no hesitation:

1) Gael Garcia Bernal
2) The person which this post is about
3) Elton Brown
4) Matt Berringer (The National)
5) Ben Folds
6) Nate from The Format
7) Zack from Away With Vega/Rodeo Ruby Love
8) Neil, who is recording Anathallo's record
9) Cameron McGill
10) Chrisface from Missouri
11) Wayne Coyne
12) Zach Braff
13) Billy Boyd
14) Blake Sennett
15) Jim from The Office
16) Ewan McGregor
17) Chuck Palahniuk
18) Jimmy from Colour Revolt
19) Rory from Heartwarmer
20) Regina Spektor (in case I ever go gay, ya know)

In other other other news, I am more hungry than before.

So, I'm on day two of my three day fast.

It's going a whole lot better than I thought it would actually. Yesterday my stomach hurt the whole day and I reeeeeeally wanted food. Towards the end of the day I just got really tired and lightheaded, so I basically hung out in my room and then went to bed at 10.

Today, I'm doing well actually. I crave food, but I don't necessarily feel hungry. I don't have a whole lot of energy, but Jeff gave me this fasting tea that really helps to keep me going. The carrot/apple juice I got is aaaaaamazing. So yummy.

I'm hoping that this cleanse will cure the chronic tiredness I've been experiencing for a while now. We'll see.

So, in conclusion, until Friday at 6pm, PLEASE do not offer me food. That would just be mean.

Step 1: Choose your victim
He may be the homeless chic one in the corner, he may be the polished, stylish one chatting up a group, or maybe the blonde with the tight jeans and bleached white smile. Whoever it is, choose wisely and commit.

Step 2: Engage your victim
Once you have chosen, stake out a spot at least a good 7-8 feet away. Smartly arrange yourself in a group of friends so that you are facing your victim. Chat with your friends while casually making eye contact for two to four seconds with your guy of choice. Never hold eye contact too long, as that moves into the realm of creeping.

Step 3: Ignore your victim
After several moments of eye contact, your victim will naturally gravitate towards you. Ignore him completely. Continue to talk with your friends and pretend not to notice that he is standing awkwardly outside of the circle, even if this continues for several minutes. He will most likely make a comment to another male in the circle to gain access. Wait for him to introduce himself to you.

Step 4: Interact with your victim
He may talk to you. He may dance very crazily two inches from your face. He may try to kiss you. Whatever he does, try to take it in for at least a minute or two before judging whether he is worth your time.

Step 5: Judge your victim
Upon seeing his skin tight Sea World t-shirt, cracking up at his intense dance moves, and trying not to vomit at his weak attempt at trying to make out with you, leave the party with friends and realize that the most attractive boys at the party are usually the ones you want to stay away from.

And there's a very cute kitty sleeping next to me.

And Laura Novak is awesomer than awesome.

And her apartment is just as awesome as she is.

And Chicago has too many good veggie restaurants.

And sometime tomorrow I might realize that I'm actually going to LA, to sit on a private cliff and watch fireworks.

Happy birthday America, happy vacation to me.

I shot a wedding (pictures to come) in Ann Arbor with the infamous Jon Shaft. It was quite a fun time, but nothing really beat us going downtown to take photos. It went something like this:


Jon: "Here's a parking garage, what? $5!?!?"
Me: "Just tell them they,(the bride and groom in the bucket seats in front of me, yes we were driving a mini van), just got married. We won't have to pay."
Jon (to parking attendant dude guy): "Hey man, how's it going? Um, they (pointing to the backseat) just got married, is it still $5?"
Parking Attendant Dude Guy: "Did they really just get married?" (he peers inside the van)
Joy and Dann: (married people): "Yup, sure did."
Parking Attendant Dude Guy: "Ok, head on in."
Videographer Nathan: "I can't believe that just fucking worked."

Situation: Taking pictures on the top level of a parking garage
Random man walks up to us.
Random man: "Hey y'all, (in a VERY southern accent), can I just take your picture?"
Bride and groom: (warily) "Sure."
(random man takes picture about two inches from bride and groom's face)
Random man: "Thanks. Congratulations to ya." (random man walks away)
Jon: "Better start searching the porn sights for your picture Dann."

Situation: Walking back to car
Me: "Whoa. Guys, I feel that I need to inform you that there is a very skinny homeless looking man on the other side of the street wearing jeans and a very nice bra. Just a bra.
Joy (the bride): (upon spotting the man) "Oh my God I want a picture with him."
(Jon sprints off down the road, hides behind a tree and channels his inner Paparazzi)
Jon (returning to us laughing our heads off): "Oh yeah, I'm good."
Joy (looking at the pictures): Wow, it's very supportive. At least he's not cheap.

For some insane reason this man is paying for me to fly out to LA July 3rd, take pictures of his band and stay in his fabulous apartment for a week.

Admit it, you'd be counting down the days/hours too.

In other news, Mike Larson called me today, I'm really afraid to call him back for some reason...

I don't understand much in my life. I definitely don't understand why I am single again, but that's the way it has to be.

I'm looking to get out of the state when I have money again. St. Louis, New York and California are all calling my name.

If you see me, I could use a hug.

Things have never really been better.

A) I am quite possibly dating the sweetest, most genuinely amazing man alive, Corban Lott. And by that, I mean I am dating him, and he might be the most amazing man alive, not that I might be dating him. I'm confusing myself.

B) I got a raise this week. Sure, come July I'll only be making 10 cents more than the people that just got hired here, but hey, 10 cents is 10 cents.

C) It is summer which means:
1) I have nothing to do at work all day, every weekday for eight hours, (hence this long, intricate entry). I plan to read a book every two weeks and have an extensive list to start. If you have any suggestions for someone who enjoys such authors as Chuck Palahniuk, Orson Scott Card, Neil Gaiman and Jonathon Safron Foer, let me know.
2) bike riding! I plan to bike at least an hour after work each day, if not more. My new sweet amazingly awesome vintage Schwinn makes me feel like a cool kid for once in my life. I wish Mt. Pleasant had longer trails. I have to go around them about 5 times to get a decent ride.
3) barbeques and summer fun! Hanging out in the park, grilling with master-chef Ralph, canoeing, bridge jumping, tubing, night walks; these are all things that have either happened or will happen very soon.
4) moving out! Although my new room at Brad and Ron's is significantly smaller, I'm really excited to decorate my it in a more subtle, sophisticated manner than my last one. Right now my house is ridiculously lonely. I don't enjoy being there in the daytime, but night is worse. It's really creepy. Anyone want to have a big sleepover on the floor of my living room before I move out? We can make forts and fun things of that nature!

D) Corban and I are going to see Daniel Johnston in concert this Wednesday at the Intersection. He will also be meeting my parents at this time, which is exciting. Of course my parents aren't coming to the concert, that would just be weird.

E) New pets? I'm seriously considering getting a snake. I know, I know, I can barely take care of my poor frog, but I reeeeeeeally want a snake to pet and hold and love and wear around my neck. I am slightly erked by the prospect of feeding it mice, but I think I would get over it eventually.

Until later,
Nicky

It's that time of the year again.
Love is in the air and all the couples out there are preparing for the most romantic holiday ever.

If I see one more fucking Valentines Day ad, I am going to kill something.
This is the only time of the year that I feel entirely justified in being completely cynical.

Just letting you know.

News:
My kidneys were infected, it's true. However, the ten hours I spent at Redi Care this week did not help the lovely intense sharp stabbing pain in my back, which was nooooooowhere near the location of my kidneys, which the Redi Care doctors did not seem to care about. Turns out, I ripped my Rhymoid (or something) muscle,(which is a big one I guess) and apparantly my work is just about the worst thing you can do when this muscle is healing. So essentially I've just been tearing my muscle more every time I work, hence why I always felt worse at work. My kidneys are fine. I don't need a CT scan, no big copay. The antibiotics that they gave me were way more than I needed and were actually making me feel very sick. Although I am pissed as hell that these idiots at Redi Care couldn't diagnose a ripped muscle, a healthy girl is a happy girl. I've just got to take it easy on the ol' back for a while, which means no riding, horses or bikes, sadness.

In other news, I just saw Pan's Labryinth. It was a very beautiful movie, one of my new favorites. It had some of the most real and greusome violence I have ever seen on film, I can see why it was rated R.

Everyone should read Stranger in a Strange Land and listen to The Boy Least Likely To.

I think I'm going to take pictures in Grand Haven tomorrow during the day and then maybe be back in Mt. P tomorrow night.